App changed my life!!! – Don't buy this app Review

Words cannot express how this app changed my life! Before, I was living under a tarp in a fish market talking to disembodied cod heads (as you do), however after downloading this app I began to feel comfortable around disembodied Atlantic salmon heads and began talking to them instead! Incredible! After saving up to buy ponies through my street act of interpretive dancing with various deceased fish I found myself sharing a stall with a rather attractive young female donkey who recently became my wife and we are expecting our first foal this fall! I am currently saving up to buy more ponies and I can only imagine how this will improve my life! Thank you kind sir!
Review by Sw40c on Don't buy this app.